Will I miss this someday?

Spencer spends basically all of his time when he's not as school, rehearsal and sleeping in our office.  So much so that my five year old nephew calls the room "Spencer's office".  I am not looking for a parent of the year award for this but if you think about it, there are a lot of worse things an eighteen year old kid could be doing. 

What drives me the most crazy about the whole thing is the MESS.  Do you see the container of week old popcorn?  The two half drunk two liters on the floor?  The almost gone soda on the desk?  The two sips out of it water bottle on the desk?  Why does someone need so many drinks at an arms length?   

I am not absent from fault.  The room is a hot mess to begin with.  One of my goals with my new flexible work schedule is to get the house organized and this room is one that I don't even know where to start. 

I keep thinking to myself that someday he won't live here anymore and maybe I will miss his god awful mess.  But will I?   At least that's what I tell myself as I try to resist the temptation to pick up the dirty socks on the floor so I can make him do it himself when he gets home.

Nobody said it was easy

I am at the end of my rope these days dealing with the grades of my high school sophomore.  The rope was frayed to begin with so I am barely hanging on. The grades are not good.  They are basically the opposite of good.  They are getting "invited" to attend parent teacher conferences for the first time in your parenting life for two teachers not good.  I woke up this morning dreading this week because of the never ending saga that plays out daily on his grade portal. 

I don't know how to make him care. 

He is smart.  He has never had to work at school to do well.  He has sailed through school with mostly A's and a few B's.  His first year in high school he had a four point average until the last trimester when it fell to a three point nine.  This year is bad.  This year is going to undo all the good that he has done and I don't know what to do about it.

He has two advanced classes and he doesn't know how to study for them. Because he has never had to study or read something on his own and be tested on a topic that the teacher hasn't even touched upon in class.  Not to mention - he doesn't want to.  He has never been a self motivator and if I didn't believe it before I now know it to be true.  The worst part is that in talking with his two teachers about the issues ( two teachers he really likes by the way) they say he is just not trying at all.  They have talked to him about putting in one hundred percent effort and he promises to do it and then totally flakes.  If he won't listen to teachers why would he listen to us?

I am full of frustration and anger toward him because it is not that hard to put in the effort.  I am full of frustration and anger at myself for agreeing that he could register for the advanced classes.  Sure his last years teachers raved about what a great student he was.  How smart he was.  How he really needed to be in AP classes.  We beamed with pride at the the time but there was the pit in my stomach saying - should he really- they don't know his work ethic - but they are teachers, they must know what they are talking about.  Forgetting for a second that teachers are human and don't always know the whole story and will make mistakes. 

I know that he is smart enough to be successful in school, even in the advanced classes.  He just has to work at it.  He just can't get to that place.  It is another one of those hard places in parenting where you are caught between your role and your past.  I certainly didn't ace through school with a four point average.  I couldn't count the number of times my mom told me that I really needed to apply myself.  I never really put in the effort she desired  but my grades got me by and my educational life all turned out good. Now the tables have turned and I realize exactly how my mom must have felt. 

So I keep pushing and praying and grasping at the frays.

Evan in a million words or less.

I was given a homework assignment by Evan's English teacher this year to describe him in a million words or less.  The following is what I wrote.

Describing Evan in a million words or less seems a daunting task when I sit down to do it.  There is so much about him that I could tell you. 

He is an excellent student.   Ever since he was a little boy he has always been so eager to learn and willing to put in the work to do it.  He is self motivating – we never have to ask him about making sure something gets done because he is always on it.  He is his own harshest critic – sometimes I think he is too hard on himself.  I predict that he will do well in English class because he has always been a    voracious reader and is a creative thinker.  Recently he has decided that he wants to write novels. 

He is a quiet kid, but not exactly shy.  He will not be a disturbance in class but I imagine will participate with his opinions and thoughts.  He tends to be quite an individualist.  He has never cared about dressing in the current style or wanting to wear what everyone is wearing.  What Evan wants to wear is what he can be most comfortable in.  His teachers last year shared stories with us of him coming to class in goofy hats or with reminder notes taped to his face.  In the middle school years of everyone trying to fit in and be like everyone else, I hope he continues to let his inherent goofiness shine through and be his own person.
 

Evan has an amazing zest for life and for having fun.  One of my favorite sights and sounds is when he is laughing his full belly laugh.  His whole face just illuminates with joy.  I hope he brings some of that to your classroom this year.

These few paragraphs have barely scratched the surface of who Evan is, but I hope it helps you to get to know him this year.   He really is an amazing kid. 

This was the teacher's response:

Hello!

I have so enjoyed getting to know Evan throughout the first few weeks of school! He is so kind, focused, and willing to share his awesome insights with his classmates. I am excited to know that he has an interest in writing novels! I have not shared this with the students yet, but I have three local authors coming in next month (after our creative writing unit) to discuss the process of writing and publishing novels! 

I am excited to get the opportunity to work the Evan throughout this school year. Please let me know if you have any questions!

This week

This sentiment is ringing very true for me this week.  It is the perfect storm (almost literally today as our winds gust over sixty miles and hour and twenty foot waves are predicted on the lake).  Trent is in the throws of show week and the kids and I have had multiple events every night.

I got home last night from a meeting for the middle school musical to find the kitchen a mess (Evan had made brownies so that mess thrown in with the still not done dinner dishes).  Hailey had the living room torn apart with her shelter she constructed for Survivor viewing.  Spencer was in his room on a device with his book report no further along than it was when I left.

So I sat down with Spencer and talked him through ideas and concepts to add to his book report - which is super hard when you have never read the book.  Not to mention teenage boys are really fun to work with especially when they want to do the minimum required and call it good.  Unfortunately for Spencer, he was not blessed with a mother who likes the minimum.  While Spencer and I were working on it, Hailey came in to show me a drawing she had made and in my frustration with life this week I was a little too sharp with her about how I couldn't look at it right this minute.

I hate that.  The minute it comes out of your mouth it just feels wrong and you want to breathe it back in but it is too late - it is hanging out there crushing their little spirit.  When I had set Spence on the right track and he was typing away I found her and apologized and let her explain her drawing to me.

Ugh.  This week - and we still have two more days to get through before we get a bit of breathing room.

So...

...I guess my boys slightly resemble their mama. 

 

We came across this picture today and Hailey thought it was Evan in a wig.  I can totally see why she thought that.  It totally screamed Evan to me as well.   Except for maybe the sweet mullet hairdo - that is all Spencer right there.   

 

 

So crazy!  Aren't genetics fun?

Thrifty Tuesday

I had to stop by the thrift store yesterday because I needed to look for a cheap putter for the school carnival and to see if I could find some replacement gym shoes for Spencer.   Don't even ask about the gym shoes.  They have apparently run off with his gym shorts to a better life.  I have no idea how long his shoes have been M.I.A. since he just confessed to losing them after I asked him which tennis shoes he had at school.  See if you can picture this in your head - Spencer and his shiny nylon basketball shorts running around the gym wearing hiking boots with most likely black socks.  I can't believe he has been getting credit for dressing for gym.  His gym teacher must think that boy is something special.

 

I have a great weakness for shoes and coats at the thrift store.  The two MAIN things my husband claims we have too many of - don't show him this photo.

 

I found two pairs of tennis shoes for Spencer.  The brown ones are Merrells (like the lost ones).  I got Hailey a pair of Lands End wet/dry sandals and a cute pair of slip on shoes.

Just a fancy picture because I am artsy like that so you can see how cute the black shoes really are.

I found Hailey three pairs of shorts for two dollars each.  A cute girly camo pair, some plaid Lands End shorts and a grey pair from Old Navy.   She might be set for summer now.  One goal for the rest of the week is to get through her dresser and closet. 

I found two shirts for Hailey.  A cute summer blue shirt with butterflies from Old Navy - it should look smashing with the shorts.  I fell in love with this owl print Hanna Andersson long sleeve.  I think it is a little big for her now, but next year. 

I also found this other Hanna Andersson short play outfit.  It is size 110 which I think might be a little small for Hailey.  I haven't tried it on her yet, but if it is we have two little cousins that would get some use out of it.  You can't pass up six dollars for a Hanna Andersson outfit - I could probably get double that for it if I sold it on Ebay.

So it turned out to be a good day of thrifting.  I even found a putter for the carnival for one whole whopping dollar!   I have a doctor appointment with the orthopedist tomorrow on the east side of town so I may have to hit the Goodwill out that way for Thrifty Thursday....

Randomness

I have a big flower pot in my garage that I planted bulbs in this fall.   The directions said to keep it in "cold storage" and covered with newspapers until we didn't have to worry about frost threats anymore.  I noticed the newspapers were all wonky and went to take a look and the plants are emerging.  They are about a foot high. I don't know what to do since we woke up this morning to about a quarter inch of snow.  I don't think they should be outside, but they are not getting sun in the garage.  I will be so bummed if all my bulbs get ruined.

Hailey and I got our Easter decorations out last night.  I have to admit that I was not really feeling the decorating.  It seems like our house is constantly cluttered and chaotic enough without adding seasonal decor to the mix.  We aren't even going to be in town for Easter so why get everything out?  But I pushed through those feelings and did it for the kids.  They love the decorations.  I remember how much I used to love it too.

I told myself I have to lose two more pounds before I can download some songs I am wanting.   The scale seems to be stuck and it is beyond frustrating. 

I have been doing great on my organizing tasks lately.  Not that you could tell by looking at my house.  It is more the stuff that is tucked away but you just know is there in a disorganized, messy pile.  I went through all the photos on my computer and burned copies to DVDs and combined folders and deleted a bunch of stuff.  I am working on organizing the kids school papers.  I found an idea on Pinterest that rocked my world.  It is funny how things snowball.  One little bit of organizing makes you feel so good that you tend to do more. 

This Sunday starts the week of H-E-double hockey sticks before the musical.  Of course it seems like we have a million things going on in the evenings.  An informational meeting about transitioning to first grade (seriously is this year going by fast!!!), Evan has baseball tryouts, Spencer has an eye appointment, all of that on top of the usual evening events and homework - UGH!  Time to get on my Single Mom Super Cape!

I told you this was going to be random!

February

I have probably mentioned this before, but when I was working (in an actual office) I used to loathe the month of January.  It was right after the hub hub of the holidays and it was such a long month with no holiday time off in the foreseeable future until Memorial Day.  When you are staring at a desk calendar every day,  January to May seems like an eternity.

The birth of Hailey on the ninth of January sort of endeared the month to me.  It is now one of my favorite three months of the year.   With her birthday coming up right on the heels of Christmas break - the first half of January goes by in a blink. 

So here we are on the first of February and I see I made a whopping two posts so far this year.  I don't know what my problem is, I just haven't felt like writing.   Yes, we have had a lot going on - we always do - but not so much that I can't take fifteen minutes or a half hour and update this thing.   I have taken pictures of the kids playing in the snow and pictures of the silly things they do, but I haven't had the motivation.  I am going to try to get better about it.

I am a little bit stressed about this month.  Evan goes in for surgery next Friday to remove the chalazion from his eyelid.  I know it is a minor thing, but the thought of him having to be put under sort of freaks me out.  I don't think his recovery will be a major thing, but I worry about him having a scar under his eye.  Should I have had a consult with a plastic surgeon?  Should I have just waited to see if it would eventually go away on its own?  Now that I am T minus seven days in counting, I am starting to second guess my decisions a little bit.

Added to that stress is the fact that Hailey went in to her well check today.  I knew she still had the irregular heart beat sometimes because every once in a while I listen to her heart as we are snuggling.  She had the EKG last year and it came back in the "normal" range.  When I asked him about it today, I expected he would just tell me not to worry about it, but instead he told me that he recommends she wears a holter monitor to record her beats for a day or so and he also thinks we should take her to a pediatric cardiologist just to make sure it is all right. 

I know I am lucky because my kids are generally very healthy and always have been and heaven knows there are kids dealing with illness that I can't even imagine, but I can't help but feel that I want all this medical drama over with.  In my gut I feel that Hailey is fine.  Trent suffers from an irregular heart beat as well and the doctor said that it most likely was an inherited thing and that she would be fine and live with it without complication.  I know in my gut that Evan will sail through his procedure like the trooper that he always is.  My gut knows these things to be true - if only my gut could convince my brain to stop coming up with the "what ifs". 

16 days later...

I can't believe I am already sixteen days into the new year without a post.  The kids went back to school late this year and when they did, we spent the rest of the week being crazy tired because our body clocks got so thrown off over break.  Add into that Hailey's sixth birthday and party planning and POOF - sixteen days go by in a blink. 

I just found this picture and it made me laugh.  One of our goals for this year is to instill a little more responsibility into the kids.  Here is what happened when Trent told Spencer to take care of his cereal bowl and put it in the dishwasher.  

Not even rinsed out and perched precariously on the bottom rack with the spoon still sticking out. 

As you can tell, we still have a long way to go.

Thrify Thursday

I have been wanting to hit the thrift stores lately in the worst way, I just haven't been able to find the time until this morning.  My intent was to get a good start on Halloween (I think my kids have finally decided what they want to be) but I didn't have any luck with that.  I think I may have to drag out the old sewing machine and actually "make make" the costumes this year as opposed to just putting them together.

 

Oh Valueland!  How I love thee!  I found a cute pink fleecy sweatshirt for me.  Since I have to be seen in public at the bus stop every morning I find myself needing some new casual threads.  I got Hailey a pink and sparkly silver striped top for fifty cents.  I was super excited about this fleecy jacket/sweatshirt I found.  I initially thought it would be for Evan, but it would probably fit Spencer as well.  I will have to see which one is in need of a fall jacket.  It was even half off so $1.50 for something my boys will fight over.

At Goodwill number two I found two polo shirts for Spencer.  One an actual Polo brand - $2.00 each.  I found Hailey a cute little ruffled Old Navy shirt that I think will match perfectly with a super cute skirt my sister bought her that I love, but have a hard time matching tops to.

 I really scored at Goodwill number one.  I spent twenty five dollars which is probably a thrift store record for me.    I found Spencer this gray and black lightweight sweater.  The boy lacks in dressy clothes.  I found this dress for Hailey at the last minute which was kind of a impromptu buy.  It is actually brown and turquoise though it looks black in the photo.  It is a size six so it should fit her next summer.  I guess for three dollars you can't really go wrong with a cute summer dress.  Whether she really needs it or not.

At the same Goodwill I found this shirt with an eight on it for Evan that I thought he would get a kick out of since it is his age.   I also nabbed up this cat frame which is going in the pile of Christmas gifts.  Once I slap a photo of Dickens in there - a nice $1.50 gift for my cat loving boy.

One of my giant scores of the day was this red wool GAP coat that I found for Hailey.  It was three dollars at Goodwill number one.  It was a size too big for her, but I could not pass it up.  A name brand wool coat for three dollars! It is a classic that will never go out of style!

 

 Look how cute the back is with the little buttons!  I was so excited!

 

Another great find was at the Rescue Mission store where I grabbed this frame for three dollars.  I like the "when I am an old woman I will wear purple" quote, but in cleaning my office I found many pieces of my kids artwork that I want to hang.  I was going to make a list and wait for a great Hobby Lobby sale but now I can cross one of those frames off.  Even on sale I would have paid three times what I did for a frame like that.

And last but not least, our new beach chair.  This was ten dollars at the Goodwill, but I knew it was worth it because I bought my mom the exact same chair for her birthday last month and paid almost three times  the cost of this one!  It will have to sit on the shelf for a few months, but will get plenty of use next summer!

No Halloween costumes, but a great day of bargain hunting!

Leap day randomness

You would think that with a whole extra day this year I would have time to do a blog post every once in a while.

Hailey and I have been fighting a cold for over a week now. It is the worst cold I have had in a long time. She seems to be finally on the mend. I can see the flicker at the end of the tunnel and am slamming Vitamin C tablets as I sprint for it. Almost there. Of course last night Spencer started to get symptoms.

I went to Kindergarten round up last night to get information on Hailey's class for next year. All day Kindergarten. I am still not sure of my feelings about any of it. They may be a forth coming post of their own. What I am sure of is that I am in denial that MY BABY is going to Kindergarten next year.

I was super excited to get up tomorrow and hang out in jammies for as long as we wanted. Then as I was snacking on a chocolate covered almond I broke off a piece of my tooth (or maybe a filling). It doesn't hurt and I wouldn't worry about it except for the fact that it is behind one of my front teeth. I really don't want it to get any worse...so off to the dentist tomorrow at nine in the morn.

Tomorrow begins the month of the musical. I am finding it harder this year to keep up with the kids on my own. There was a tiny window in between babies and big kids where it seemed easy. Now with more places to be, more homework - it is hard for me to do it all.

It is hard to believe that February is over tomorrow. We have done a lot this month:

Struggled through Spencer's Biographical Book Report

Traveled to Wisconsin to celebrate birthdays of Mira and Lainey.

Valentine's Day and parties

The 100th day of school for the boys

Reading The Hunger Games trilogy in about three days. So good. Peeta may have replaced Edward in my juvenile fictional character love obsession.

I cleaned out the laundry room and created a "homework station". Which the boys are lukewarm to, but Hailey LOVES.

The boys made their Cub Scout advancements at the Blue and Gold banquet.

My cleaning and organizing has taken a huge hit with the on set of this cold. Along with my diet and exercise routine. I feel like I want to work out, but last week the one day I did, I paid for it the next day with a worsening (word?) of symptoms.

We finally found out (after three weeks of calling and waiting) that Hailey's heart "problem" is considered in the normal range and doesn't present the need for any additional testing at this time. We were grateful for the good news, but I am still feeling like I want to know what the problem is and why does it come and go. I don't want to look for problems, but I want my little girl to be OK. We are supposed to watch for any episodes of fainting or shortness of breath that would indicate a growing or intensifying issue.

I think I am starting to be confident that this "winter" may never happen. It seemed too good to be true in January and February - I was just waiting for the massive snowfall to hit - but now that it is going to be March... We may have lucked out this year. Bring on Spring!!!

Randomness

Lately I feel like I am buried in my kids' schoolwork. It seems like we eat dinner, do homework and then it is time to get ready for bed. I am tired of math facts. I never liked or was good at math when I was in school. Isn't life ironic sometimes? Thank goodness their Daddy was a math major or they would be doomed.

I went to the doctor today for my sore leg. It has only been hurting since last spring. She wants me to get an xray to rule anything bone spurry out, but thinks it is just a muscle. Now I get to add physical therapy to my never ending list of activities. I hope they can figure out what muscles need to be worked on fairly quickly.

I can consistently run a mile without stopping to walk. I haven't been able to do that since before I had kids. I am pretty proud of myself.

I just found out that I have to have the boys' Halloween costumes ready by Thursday for their scout meeting. Time to get out the black spray paint.

I have really slacked off on my 36and5 blog. I know I probably have a picture from almost every day, but just haven't posted them. I am trying to get better at it because I was looking back through them the other day and saw some stuff I forgot about and was loving having it on there. I may go back and try to "back post" some stuff, it will be time consuming, but I know I won't regret it. Yeah right, in all my free time.

I am so tired tonight and I still have to go to a meeting about the school Walk-a-thon. Maybe because I got a flu shot today? I am so thankful that I can hang out in my jammies tomorrow morning. I would love to hang out in them all day but I suppose I have to make a meal plan and go to the store at some point so our family can eat something besides grilled cheese and frozen pizza.

Evan has a box hanging from our upstairs banister on a string that he has been using for practicing his karate kicks. That kid just makes me laugh. He woke up with a dry pull up today for the first time EVER. I don't know if he was just dehydrated or what, but we were all excited. Dare we hope that he is beginning to grow out of his bladder issues? Fingers crossed.

Thrifty Thursday

I am thinking that Thursday might become my day to head to all my favorite thrift shops. Of course on Thursdays I have Hailey with me and that leads to some unfortunate impulse buys.

Our first stop this morning was Meijer. I had to pay my credit card bill and pick up a few things. I caved and spent the dollar to let Hailey ride in the "movie" cart so I puttered around a bit to give her some extra fancy cart riding time. I found her a dress for next summer for four dollars. I got a pair of shorts for Evan for three dollars. Pajamas for both her and Evan (three piece sets) for six dollars. I still haven't decided whether or not I am going to save these for Christmas. I always get my kids pajamas for Christmas. They certainly could use them now though. How do pajamas get so ratty so fast?

Our next stop was the Goodwill closest to our house. I found two pairs of jeans for one of the boys - whichever they will fit best. Three dollars a pair. Also a cute little dress for Hailey. I think that was three dollars as well. Oh and an impulse buy - that little flower bucket she had to have. At least it matches with her room decor.

Next stop was back to Valueland where we had scored the awesome deals last week. We didn't do quite as well as last week, but not bad at all.

A suade leather coat for Spencer for Halloween. Honestly it is nice enough for him to wear out on dressy occasions. It cost me a dollar fifty. Hailey wanted the Tinkerbell dress to wear to her daddy's play this fall. How could I resist for two dollars. Plus another quarter for the wings.

One of the main reasons I went was to find a Bundt pan. I found this Nordic Ware one and got it half off. A dollar fifty. I was so happy!

I am starting to think I have some sort of obsession with buying little girl shoes. Each pair was two dollars, how could I resist?

Finally, three sweaters for myself. I am so tired of my clothes lately it is nice to have some new options, especially when they cost about two dollars a piece.

I am loving my thrify Thursdays!

So true

Trent may not be a stay at home dad, but he is also that dad - and I couldn't be more grateful and his children could not be any more lucky.

A father's day wish: Dads, wake the hell up! (CNN) -- The woman started crying. I didn't expect this, because, well, why would I? We were two adults, standing in a preschool auditorium, waiting for the year-end musical gala to begin, talking summer plans and Twitter and junk fiction and all things mindless parents talk at mindless events. Then -- tears. "My husband," she said, "doesn't care." "Uh, about what?" I asked. The floodgates now open, she told me her husband works from home. But he never drops their daughter off at preschool. He never picks their daughter up at preschool. He never wakes up with their daughter, never puts her to bed, never takes her to a movie or a carnival or a ball game; never comes up with fun daddy-daughter activities. "All he worries about is golf," the mother said. "Sometimes he'll take her to the driving range for an hour. But that's it. ..." Two days later, by mere coincidence, a different mother cornered me. I was sitting in a pizzeria with my son, Emmett, and daughter, Casey, gnawing on a calzone. The woman, another preschool regular who always seems to be dragging around her kids with the worn look of a chain gang inmate, glanced my way and muttered, "My husband would never do that." "Do what?" I asked. "Be out alone with both of the kids at once," she said. "Never." In case you are wondering, I am that dad. The one who works out of the house. The one who drives his kids to school, packs lunches and pushes swings and arranges play dates and attends teacher conferences and -- generally speaking -- frequently finds himself alone in brightly colored rooms filled with women and tykes. Along with my wife (who, until recently, also worked from home), I wipe snot, clean poop, order time outs and say no -- Really, no! I'm being serious, no! -- to the damned ice cream man and his Satanic siren call. I know all of my kids' friends, and most of their tendencies (Ashley and Emily love dolls, Lucas only wants to talk about Derek Jeter, Tyler digs applesauce). Hence, I have been sent here today, on behalf of the stay-at-home mothers of the world, to convey to my fellow pops a message of love and hope in this lead-up to Father's Day: Wake the hell up. Really, wake the hell up. Now. I understand that most of you have 9-to-5 jobs, that you leave tired and come home tired and just wanna chill in front of SportsCenter with a bowl of chips. But, seriously, you have no remote idea: Being a stay-at-home parent is exhausting. At the office, you can hide. You can take lunch. You can pretend you're working while scrolling the Internet for Yankees-Blue Jays and, ahem, Lindsay Lohan news. You have genuine social interactions with folks over the age of, oh, 12. People ask questions about your day -- and listen to the answers. I envy you, but I sort of pity you. Kids grow. Age 1 turns to age 3, which turns to age 7, which turns to 15 and 18 and 21, all in the blink of an eye. If you're there, as I am, it flies. If you're not there -- if you're almost never there -- it barely exists at all. Which is why I just can't stomach those millions of dads who view their days at home as recovery from work, who'd rather rest than engage, who have no problem with passing the tykes off for more alone time with mom and who, literally, moan to their wives, "You have no idea how hard I work." For you, I offer these 10 commandments of righteous fatherhood. Pay close attention, because, behind your back, people are pitying your wife: 1. No golf on weekends: Seriously, it's ludicrous. Your spouse is home with the kids all the time, and you think it's OK to take five hours on a weekend day to pursue your own pastime? Selfishness, thy name is Father. 2. Wake up: Literally, wake up. With your kids. On at least one of the two weekend days -- and perhaps both. I know: you wake up early for work. Not even remotely the same thing. Rising alongside the kiddies is hard. And crazy. And (gasp!) sorta fun, if you'd just stop moping. 3. Change diapers: If you have little kids, and you don't know how to change diapers (or, even worse, refuse to change diapers), you're pathetic. That's no exaggeration -- p-a-t-h-e-t-i-c. It's not all that hard, and though the poop sometimes winds up on the fingers, well, uh, yeah. It just does. Wash your hands. 4. Play with dolls and paint your toenails: How many fathers do I know who refuse to get girlish with their girls? Dozens. Dude, put aside the machismo, break out Barbie and slather on some pink polish. You'll make a friend for life -- and nobody else is watching. 5. Do things you don't want to do: It's easy to take the kids to the driving range -- because you want to be there. Now try spending the day having a tea party at American Girl. Or crawling through one of those wormholes at the nearby kiddie gym. Fun? Often, no. But this isn't about you. 6. Order the wife to bug off: I recently met a mother who told me her husband hadn't been alone with their 9-year-old daughter for more than two hours ... ever. Inexcusable. Let your wife do her own thing: relax, take a run, whatever. Entertain your children solo. They don't bite (Note: CNN.com is not liable if your children do, in fact, bite). 7. Surprise! Just once, on a random day without meaning or purpose, show up early at your kid's school/camp/wherever, say "Get in the car!" and take him/her somewhere special. Just the two of you, alone. A movie. A park. A hike. The memory lasts -- I promise. 8. Dishes Don't Clean Themselves (Nor Do Toys): It's amazing how this one works. You pick up a dish, run it under hot water with some soap, rub it down with a towel and place it back on the shelf. Then repeat. 9. Wake up your kid: Not often. But if you want to score big points and create a killer memory moment, walk in Junior's room at, oh, midnight, wake him/her up and go outside for 10 minutes to watch the stars. 10. For God's sake, tell your kids you love them: They never see you, and they'd probably like to know. Bud, as you read this your wife is expecting little -- and your kids are expecting even less. Pull one out of the blue. Make Father's Day less about you, and all about them. The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of Jeff Pearlman.

They don't make 'em like they used to

A few weeks ago, my Mom gave me this shirt ( I call it a shirt, but I think it was originally meant to be a dress) for Hailey that was previously worn by me. Being that it was originally a hand me down from one of my cousins - this little number is over four decades old.

It is in fabulous condition for its age. I am not a huge vintage clothes fan for myself, but on little girls -LOVE.

This shirt is made so well. It looks home made, but it is not. There is a tag in it. It was from what I am assuming was a very trendy and not cheap store in the Chicago area.

It just goes to show you that they don't make stuff the way they used to. My kids have brand new clothes that they wear one time and then they are snagged, have strings hanging off of them or holes and tears.

Just like the fridge in our garage that I had to have the repairman come look at and found out the problem was a packing peanut stuck in the fan. He commented that the fridge was old. I told him he had no idea. That fridge was in my house when I was born - it is going on forty years. He laughed and told me that it would last longer than the fridge that I currently had in my kitchen.

Back then they made things to last is what he told me.

I guess he was right.

And bless my mom for hanging on to all these olden day gems. I guess I know where I get it from!

Morning

I woke up this morning to snow on the ground, a bed that needed changing after a night time pee pee incident and dreading a trip to the grocery store with a mile long list.

Not the greatest way to start the week, but it could be a whole lot worse. My poor flowers cannot get a break. Last year it was the deer, this year they better survive this late season snowfall. I am keeping my fingers crossed and maybe getting out some old blankets for tonight.

Blast from the past

The kids decided that since the weather was warming up, it was time to get out the basket of bubbles and bubble blowing paraphernalia. I had to laugh when I noticed the actual bubbles they were playing with.



These are the bubbles from our wedding - thirteen and a half years ago. We decided to have people blowing bubbles at us as we left the church instead of throwing birdseed. Trent's Mom and Dad pasted on the labels, tied on the ribbon and hot glued the roses on hundreds of those little containers. Needless to say, we had a few dozen left over. I had them in a box with our other wedding stuff for the longest time until I got into a major purge mood and put them in the garage with the rest of the bubbles from various occasions and holidays.

Sentimental or hoarder? Some days it is hard to tell.

Fifty

It is fifty degrees outside.

There is a lot of this going on: Snow melting. Hallelujah! Don't think we didn't spread it around a little bit to get it to melt even faster. Because we did.

There is some of this going on: Tricycle riding around in the driveway.

There is a little bit of this going on: Playing chalk in the driveway. We are working on writing her name.

There is a lot of this going on: Big smiles as the realization hits that we are finally moving on to the next season.

There is also a lot of this going on: New life. I can see my little plants budding up all over the place. I even got out the Deer Stop and started spraying so they hopefully will not get munched before they have a chance to grow. The other night we saw eleven deer crossing our road and hanging out in our neighbors yard. Crazy.

There is some of this going on: Enjoying the last snow of the year. Hopefully.

There is also a lot of this going on: Tearing down and replacing of drywall.

My builder cousin has been over on our roof and in our house trying to figure out the source of our leak and fix it. They think they have it. I so pray that it is fixed. I know that my little leak and messy-out-of-order house is nothing compared to what is happening in Japan right now. When I am feeling overwhelmed by the chaos and the clutter of this, I take the time to realize how very lucky and blessed I am.

So now I am thinking about paint colors again. As long as we have to paint the wall - we might as well paint it a different color. Right?