Seven

Dear Spencer, 

Seven years ago you gave me the honor of becoming a mother - your mother.    With that honor you gave me a sort of calling for my life.   I don't really remember what my life was like before I became a mom and whatever I was doing before that time seems trivial and unimportant compared to this "job" I have now.  This title I hold of Mom gives me the most inspiring and rewarding and at times the hardest job I could ever dream of finding.  I thank you for that my first born child. 

I look at that picture of me holding you in the hospital and it seems like yesterday but also like forever ago.   Those newborn baby days pass by in such a haze of bliss and terror.   I remember bits of things so well but so much is lost somewhere deep in my memories.  We made so many mistakes as new parents and since you were our first born, our guinea pig per se, you bore the brunt of them.  I am sure by the time you are grown we will have made many more, so please bear with us. 

You are now seven years old.  Seven!  I know it is so cliche' but I just don't know where the years have gone.   In the fall, you will be starting first grade.   For the first time in your life you will be away from home all day long.   I will no longer be the person you spend the bulk of your day with.  You will have a new "teacher" and I pray that you will be looked after and that I have taught you enough in these years that you can look after and look out for yourself.  I feel so blessed and fortunate that I have been able to be home with you all of these years.  Sure there are times that I am ready to tear my hair out, but the majority of the time has been little moments that will be forever in my heart and memories.  Moments that I would never have wanted to miss - moments that I will cherish forever.  

You have grown into such a social little guy.  You have lots of friends and make new friends so easily.  You have a magnetic personality or something - people just seem to be drawn to you.   We will be at the park or anywhere there are kids around and you will just run up and join into the game they are playing.  If you are playing by yourself I hardly have time to blink before someone has joined you to play a game.  I am thrilled that you seem to have outgrown your shyness.  I never did, and it is a hard way to go through life. 

You are our scientist.  You love science and experiments.  You enjoy building your own inventions and contraptions and playing with your Lego's.    You are always curious to know how things work.  One of your favorite shows is How it's made on the Discovery channel.   The show takes the viewer step by step through how something is made - hence the title.   The other night I was flipping channels and you were begging to watch something on cartoon network.  As I flipped I noticed that How it's made was on and you were instantly hooked.  You looked at the TV and said to me "oven knobs!!!" in the most excited voice I have ever heard.  They were actually making padlocks but the dial sort of looked like oven knobs.   You also like to watch Food Network with me and while we were watching Iron Chef you saw previews for a new show called Food Detectives - all about food science and myths.  You could hardly wait for the premiere.   You say that when you grow up you want to be a scientist and a magician.  

You are such a boy.  You are very into your video games and TV shows.  You think that "potty" type humor is side splitting hilarious.  You love running around in the yard with your buddies playing "war" type games or the "ball" game.   Though you are all boy, I love that you still have an innocence about you.   You will still let me hug and kiss you -  many mornings I will be getting breakfast ready and you will come over and hug me and tell me that I forgot my morning hug.   You are extremely attached to your stuffed animals - especially the cats.  I let you pick out a new Webkinz for your birthday and you chose a pink cat.  I told you that we could find another cat if you didn't want a pink one - you wanted the pink one.  

At seven years old you are still a bit lazy.  I don't know where this comes from since your Dad and I are totally the opposite - we are usually going crazy if we aren't doing something.   You are starting the pre-tween backtalk a little.  If we tell you to do something "in a minute" or "but, Mom" is a typical comeback.   We are trying to instill in you that the correct answer every time is "OK".  It is a slow process.  You have  a bizarre fondness for  being naked.  One minute you will be fully clothed and the next second you are laying around watching TV in your underwear or bare naked.  Sometimes there will be a drop of water or something on your shirt and you tell me you couldn't wear it anymore because it was wet.  This habit drives me crazy!

You look forward to going up North to the cabin.  It is so much fun for you to run around up there in the woods and to splash around in the river.  You enjoy fishing there or at Grampa Paul's house.   It is funny to me that you are starting to get a little squeamish about touching the fish and even touching bugs and things we see around the house.  You have outgrown your little toddler sense of "let me just grab that thing and see what happens".  

You like playing baseball but enjoy the social aspect of it the most.  Instead of paying attention to the game you are more likely to be chatting up the player on the base you are covering.   You are a great swimmer and are still a natural little fish in the water.   You just finished tennis lessons for the summer.  You had also taken them a few years back.  You really enjoy tennis and seem to have a natural ability for it - probably more so than any other sport you have tried so far.   Of course your favorite day of practice was the day you all got to play games and hit water balloons with your racquet's -  again, the social butterfly!

In re-reading what I wrote here, it seems to me like I have barely scratched the surface of who you are and who I see in you on a daily basis.  When I try to think of what I want to write - how I want to try to capture you with the written word - my brain just flashes with images and snippets of conversation - a little mini movie in my head that just makes me smile and know that I am unable to fully explain you in a "paper doll" version.  You are too complex and multifaceted.   I still look at you sometimes as I do with your brother and sister and think in my head "this came from me - this amazing little person came from me".  It still seems surreal sometimes even though I have had that thought for seven years now.  

I love you Spencer!  I am so proud of who you are and who I can see you becoming.  You are a special kid and I know that you will do great things in your life.  You have a boundless potential that is going to take your farther than your Dad and I could ever dream.  I pray that you keep believing in yourself and following your own path.  Happy birthday my baby boy!

Love, Mom